Life Hurts

The World Health Organisation’s World Mental Health day was Wednesday but Mental Health is something that we need to think about every day. We can’t escape from our own minds although sometimes we try. For some people every day is like a sentence – it is always there and you can’t get away. What is in your mind is hard to heal, it doesn’t just heal like a cut or a bruise. It needs special care from you and other people around you to get better.

Sometimes life does hurt and on those days you need to take special care of yourself. It really is ok to stay in bed or linger in a hot bath. It is ok to not work, to relax, to create for the sake of it or to listen to music or read a book even when there is a kitchen full of dishes or a huge pile of ironing. It doesn’t always matter that things are not done. What matters more is you and how you are feeling. Yes sometimes we do feel better for getting up, dressing up and showing up but we need to be kind to ourselves and recognise the days and moments when it is just too difficult.

It can take huge strength to not get drawn in to drugs and alcohol to escape the pain in your mind. People often judge those with addictions. Mental health and addiction can go hand in hand. We should not judge these people. Behind the addiction is often huge pain. We can put our energy into helping them. Get a plan together, send them to the services that can help. Don’t be scared of them, put yourself in their shoes and think how happy you would be if you were them and they gave you enough money for a cuppa or a bowl of food. My beautiful daughter understood this. She had stood on both sides, taking drugs and being clean. The pressures of her life got to her, she went through some truly awful circumstances blow after blow. Who could blame her for trying to escape her own mind? She conquered her addiction though and we were so proud of her. She still could not escape her mind  and all the pain.

Days can be up and down. . Sometimes we discover something like a plaster that hides well what is going on in our mind and covers it all up so you can almost ignore it until the edges start peeling away – the danger is in not seeing the sides peel away until it’s too late. This could be your ‘smile mask’ and you ‘power through’. But although that will not always mend what is going on inside your head it can make you feel a little more motivated that you have been able to face that day head on thus giving yourself that feeling of achievement. Other days be kind to yourself. Call a friend if you can, ask for help, do something just for you. Don’t underestimate human kindness and how it can help you heal yourself.

Mermen for Mind are supporting people with Mental Health problems by supporting Mind. They campaign for better services and want to be able to help everyone who comes to them and asks for help. Ask them if you need to – they will always help you. Just never ever give in. There is always a solution and a way out of the darkness of your own thoughts.

“For a long time I tried healing myself not through care and balance but through overworking. Then it was under-eating. Then it was becoming reliant on the wrong company. You cannot escape a struggling mind. It will not heal. But it is always temporary. Do not rely on control, rely on balance”. – Ellen Scott.

Written by Anna Scott | 14.10.2018

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